It’s a funny thing that we humans are so unprepared to go out into the world and communicate with each other effectively. It is the one activity that we all must do to survive in the world, but we are given little instruction about how to do it well. It is just something that everyone is expected to know once we have been taught basic grammar as children. Too bad
that
no one
ever told us thatToo bad that no one ever told us that every time we open our mouths, or keep silent, it is an opportunity to make or break a relationship.

The Greek physician Hippocrates is credited with discovering, in the year 400 B.C., that behavior can be divided into various styles. Today, it is widely held that there are four primary types. Although there are a myriad of labels, the descriptions are essentially the same.

About 70% of individuals will possess two or more of the traits. Additionally, many people will demonstrate a different primary trait depending upon the setting.

Social styles consideres two main ways that others perceive your behavior:

• Assertiveness: The way in which a person is perceived as attempting to influence the thoughts and actions of others. This scale ranges from “Ask” to “Tell” and is ultimately about “pace”.
• Responsiveness: The way in which a person is perceived as expressing feeling when relating to others. This ranges from “People” to “Task” and is ultimately about “showing emotion”.

Through close observation, the dimensions of behavior of others can be identified. This awareness provides an insight to greatly enhancing relationships with them. By combining the assertive behavior with the responsive behavior, the behavioral style becomes evident. The four behavioral styles are as follows:

• Amiable style is “ask-directed assertive”, “people-directed responsivesess”, “slow pace” and tends to “display emotions”. They speak more slowly and thoughtfully, use variety in their vocal tone, and they’re very sensitive to the needs or reactions of others. The amiable style is the most concerned with relationships and can become upset if there is discord in the office. They can lose sight of practicality if overwhelmed with emotional issues or relationship problems.

• Analytical style is “ask-directed assertive”, “task-directed responsiveness”, “slow pace” and tends to “control emotions”. This style is restrained in communication. The voice is often subdued, frequently monotone. The focus is on tasks. They have great interest for, and appreciation of, facts and data. The analytical style is reserved in the pace of speech, speaking more slowly and offering fewer statements. Their body language is more controlled and reserved. They may “clam up” with those who are overly aggressive or emotional.

• Driving style is “tell-directed assertive”, “task-directed responsiveness”, “fast pace”, tends to “control emotions” but tends to “make more statements”. They speak fast and are very direct. Though they don’t often use a wide range of vocal tone or inflection, they often speak louder than those of other styles. The driving style tends to focus on results and outcomes. They may become impatient with those who take too long to make decisions or those who are overly emotional.

• Expressive Style is “tell-directed assertive”, tends to display emotions “people-directed responsiveness”, “fast pace” and “lots of emoting”. Individuals of the expressive behavioral type tend to make more statements. They speak faster, use more variety in their vocal tone, and they’re frequently very animated in conversation. The expressive style tends to focus on issues with people, and they often use stories in making their points. They are often highly spontaneous and can generate high-energy and creative ideas for the practice. Follow-through, however, can be a challenge for these folks.

When you add four levels to each axis, a 16 element matrix is formed:

The dynamics of behavioral style plays a significant role on the actions and reactions of individiuals in social situtions. Because of the significant differences in the four behavioral styles, there are conflicts that can naturally occur in daily interactions. Without the benefit of understanding the different behaviors, frustration and anger can occur. This can happen within the team, family unit or during daily social interactions.

The most obvious conflict occurs with the styles that are diagonally opposite on the behavioral style model. For example, a driving style person who wants people to get straight to the point without emotions can become very irritated with an amiable style person who chats leisurely about family and seems tentative in action. This may cause the driving style person to become more assertive and the amiable style person to experience emotional stress in response.

The expressive style person may come in the office full of ideas and excitement. The analytical style wants to know the facts to support their ideas. The expressive style is met with skepticism by the analytical style who chalks up their ideas as lacking in foundation and overly emotional in tone.

The key to making social styles meaningful in the office is to modify your own behavior to meet the needs of the other person. This doesn’t mean giving up yourself, but adjusting your manner of self-presentation to help the other person feel comfortable with you. When this is done, it is far more likely that your verbal message will be heard. When the entire team strives to understand and communicate effectively with each other, the entire climate of the office improves, staff is happier, patients are happier, and productivity increases. When others see that you are striving to communicate more effectively, you are likely to receive greater endorsement by them. The purpose of behavior modification should NEVER be for the purpose of manipulation, but for the purpose of increased understanding.